Humor: They’re just baby shoes so please stop overanalyzing my ad

Nov 01, 2024

Recently, I posted this simple advertisement on Craigslist. “Baby shoes for sale, never worn.” The internet blew it up. Everyone had a theory or story behind my ad.

Why are you all making a big deal out of this? I was trying to do something nice: sell some unused baby shoes at a low price. But suddenly, I’m the center of all these think pieces. But no more. This has to stop. I’m not going to substantiate any of your theories.

Oh, and a word to those of you who keep asking me, “Did you lose the baby?”

WHAT THE HECK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!

Even if that were the case, you would be asking the worst question possible to a probably bereaved individual. Congratulations if dredging up painful memories is an easy price to pay in order to satisfy your ego. Maybe read something educational and stop over-analyzing six words on Craigslist.

And to those who say I’m being defensive and could have explained myself in more detail, let me remind you that it’s the internet. Brevity is key. But since you might still find this long explanation of my innocent intentions too brief, feel free to read the updated ad below:

For Sale: Baby shoes, never worn. They are still in the box. I was at Macy’s and had to add something to my purchase to get the 50% off deal. The cheapest thing within reach was a pair of baby shoes. So I grabbed them and got my new wool sweater for half the price. Score! I don’t have a baby and didn’t want the shoes, but I also didn’t want to give them away without trying to get back some of the $20 I spent on them. Sorry if this is not the sad tale you wanted to share with your friends. But if you like the truth and need cheap, good-quality baby shoes, please get in touch.

Writing dumb things to make you laugh